Once my younger daughter Alice turned two years old, everyone in my family finally slept through the night. That is, until eleven days after Alice’s second birthday when, tragically, she did not wake up from her nap. No cause of death could be determined after an autopsy and thorough death investigation, making Alice one of the 400 children ages one to 18 whose deaths are classified as Sudden Unexplained Death in Childhood (SUDC) every year. My devastation felt life-threatening. But despite the profound exhaustion that accompanied my grief, I found myself unable to sleep, fighting off insomnia night after night.
As a Traditional Chinese Medicine (TCM) doctor and former medical researcher, I knew everything to do—and not do—when experiencing insomnia. I did not use screens or work in bed. I meditated before bed. I set aside at least eight hours of dedicated time for sleep each day. Unfortunately, none of it was working. I even tried sleep medications prescribed by my doctor to no avail. At work and with my family, I have always been a sleep proselytizer. I believe quality sleep is the foundation of health, but despite my passion and my efforts, I could not lay myself down to sleep after my daughter died in her sleep.